He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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