He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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