i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I understand Curling. That high.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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