I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
