the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
