guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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