I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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