Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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