weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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