In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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