Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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