Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Randomize
