my soul wont recognize me after tonight
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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