Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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