Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize