6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
