im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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