and you said cock pushups were impossible
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize