I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize
