So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Edward fifth and chaser hands
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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