You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
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