I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize
