I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
His hands were made for my vagina.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
