I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
