Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
