worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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