Just fell off a train. Bad.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
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