i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
so let's talk penis.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Randomize
