Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
