"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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