i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
