You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize