Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I need water and some morals
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
