The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
We just shotgunned beers for America
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
