Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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