Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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