shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
