No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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