Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
