Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
