summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Randomize
