Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Mom said you looked used
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
