If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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