Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
