Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
