I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
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