no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Randomize
