Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
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