just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize