Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
