Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
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