Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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